When to Follow the Rules (For Prescriptive Grammarians)

Note: This (slightly satirical) article is specifically tailored to prescriptive grammarians. If you are a descriptive grammarian, this article will most likely anger you, and it would benefit you to read this article instead.

Do you always have to follow the rules of "who" and "whom?" Those who have been using the word "who" rather than the word "whom" for their entire lives may be shocked at how often "whom" should be used according to traditional rules of grammar. They may wonder if that means they have been wrong for their whole lives.

They have indeed been wrong for their whole lives. By no means may "who" be used in place of "whom" at any time. Such solecisms are unnatural and horrendous! Language has strict rules that must be followed at all times, and anyone who disagrees is a complete fermion-head — end of story!